Life Of Mine

2008-11-11T01:09:00.000+08:00

my family is a burden to you and even to me.
so i deserved to be left aside?
so i deserved to being put in a isolated cell? i can see surrounding but i can't feel anything.
sometimes get happening but i can't do anything. i feel it's about both parties. i thought after that "911", things can be better. Eventually after that day, everything seems so "nothing had happen before". that feel really scared me at the moment but i was told not think so much.
am i really that bad? that to the extend...? i really don't know what to say and how to express.. i feel like i'm really the lost one.. things kept happening and makes me feel so uncertain where i stand and where i belong.
if i am not wrong? we are going to mama's house? am i right?
ohh.. mum wants me bring some items home. so can i take train to kovan, take from her which takes the most 15minutes and direct myself home?(for my info: i took 10mins) so so.. all and all, it only take the most 10minutes extra and i reached mum's house at 7.10pm. Let's say, if i take train to amk and take bus, what time will i reach mum's house? isn't it plus and minus?
if kovan is not a presant place? we can have alternative, like meet at mum's house? just that i can't accompany you. so what's wrong with me that i did anything wrong?
mum wants me to carry stuffs?
i want? nope.. i hate it the most. but i only have 1 mum. what to do. :`(
so what happen to you? is it that you dislike my last mintue plan or dislike how my mum treat me or it's in me?
if last min plan? really not i want..
if dislike how my mum treat me? why i am inside ice palace now..
if it's me? what did i do wrong? and no one tells me and i don't see what i had done wrong.
When i told you, i going to carry stuff from my mum. i was happy cause i know mum wasn't at home. (not at home, you'll be happy)
But but... when i told you about it, your voice totally changed. i feel and was about to propose you an alternative plans. example; see you at mama's house like same timing if i meet u at amk. but i didn't cause... since 1 side is "tired", how can u makes both sides to do clapping game? if can, how can it be fun?
how are you? how am i? i really really tired and can't sleep. really lost and can't see myself.. i know study is important. But if studies come 1st, so i'm 2nd or? don't telll me, am i actually your 1st? if that so.., i only derseve to *Ring.....* "Wei wei... wad're u doing? want to sleep le ah? ok.... ok...? (pls talk more) hao ba. wan an. :( " (for my info: since exam coming, i keep wanting to spend more times with you but...)
when can i meet you? hope you knows in the 1st place that i can't meet tomorrow casue either today or tomorrow it's shawn's birthday celebration. so wed, but how we face one another?
act like nothing or...?

so this is how i should be treated? why am i your future husband, boyfriend or whatever? don't tell me, your mum is right from the start?
i'm going crazy... real crazy with head keep spinning....

Incoming...

2008-10-29T21:50:00.003+08:00

Pushing, leading and all my life are planned "nicely" for me to walk through. Sometimes i want it my way, i'm not trying to be stubborn. But i have my plans too..
How to understand someone and give the best out of all? If both can't have the same concept of leading life, how can we manage it?
am i the trouble one?

coffee, tea or me?

2008-09-09T00:06:00.001+08:00

If one day or maybe now, you really need to choose either studies or us...
Just follow your heart, maybe our love is just so crispy and weak..
We can't even compromise into our love.
Can't speak out when thing isn't right? Or is this how relationship should be, like not to speak out?

i can't neither sense you nor feel you when your heart are broken up into pieces, cause you're just so hard on appearance. i always have this feel that having me is a biggest mistake for you.
is there a need for you to consider me again?

i can't do anything now, i need to lay down now..

What is relationship?

2008-08-31T11:19:00.002+08:00

i think i can't really make life easy for people.
i just want to make life easy and simple.
but no matter what i still make someone down.
is it very hard to be with me?
i always feel that i'm not good enough to at least make you comfortable with me.
and things always happen and allows me to feel this.
feeling is so strong, stronger and stronger..

i really don't know what is happening when someone don't speak out.
why human just don't speak out when something is not right.
maybe this is part of life, when you trying to play guessing game.
someone told me, "don't think so much, you always think so much."
i don't want to be a quitter, so either i can be a thinker or a waiter...
but if i don't be thinker when something is not right, then what is my next move?
be a waiter?

why can't people speak out and always like to come blog to speak out..
is it we can't trust one another or we can manage our circle of trust?

i'm really so lost and don't know what to do.. i can't be thinker for long..
make i only can be a waiter, wait for you blog and see what is happening.
if this thing really continue, maybe our relationship really need mayday.

seriously i feel like i'm a piece of junk, a person that can't be relay on...
really like a junk...

i though i love myself and really love you so deeply..
but what happen is, i think the person i dislike and hate the most is...
me, myself and my life....

i have no comment/s in life..

2008-08-13T00:56:00.001+08:00

to be frank but i think i was wrong.
are we still together or....

2008-08-11T23:39:00.002+08:00

Don't wait to be loved to love its the title
Turn back, my lover.
I never move, waiting for you to turn back.
While you leave me further and further,
what I only can do is to love you deeper and deeper.
Turn back, my dear.
I still stand here where you leave me alone.
I don't move course I'm afraid that once you turn back,
If I'm not here, I'll miss you.
Turn back, my heart.
If you have made decision, you'll never turn back.
I can say nothing but I will go.
I will go on the way which you are walking on.
I'm going the way to love you,
which you will love me so.
We're so in love.

2008-05-14T00:20:00.002+08:00

Perhaps i need to have upgrade in my understanding skills.
Or anyone really understand me too?

Am i too much when handling in love? I really don't know. =(

Too heavy or to unload...?

2008-05-13T12:19:00.001+08:00

Sometimes caring not really must have, then when should we care more...?
No idea, neither do i...

Maybe love shouldn't care as much as i think..
Sometimes we just have to let it be...

sometimes you wish to care, they don't,
sometimes you don't think should care, they want,
sometimes you have no idea what's your action/s should be,
sometimes you just dizzy up your mind,
sometimes speak up will be fine,
sometimes just that people will like to do so,
sometimes people will react when they feel hurt,
sometimes why must get hurt before we can prevent?

2008-05-13T07:20:00.004+08:00

1 of the ways to make life easy

Expect lesser in life.

Does it count like:
Thinking too much for future life during relationship?
If expect lesser, will make relationship like non-serious kind?

Overall, am i thinking too much?

Things should let in be, perhaps not to force.

2008-05-13T03:45:00.000+08:00

Time to lay off now...
ZzzzzzzzzzzZzzzzzzzzzzzz

2008-05-13T03:14:00.000+08:00

Drinking will hurt your injuries...
but it's only way that smooth you to fall into sleep...

2008-05-13T02:22:00.001+08:00

i think it's certainly hard to sleep through this night when you keep thinking whether you are really too much. keep think whether i should really tone down and how much should i...
wanting to talk but what can we say, she can't even speak up...
maybe silent is the best between us?

What girls need, boys don't know,
What boys need, it's too obvious...

2008-05-13T01:48:00.001+08:00

is it a person will really want look far into relationship, is too scary? wanting and really keen to want his future to be good also, scary? someone who really serious in relationship like me, actually should tone down? in the extend, not to care too much?

2008-05-13T01:15:00.000+08:00

it's not give up, but what i had done.
seems too much burden to you.. and what i did was too much for you?
i did carry on to take care of you but it's like i stress you up.
i try to tone down and let you be.
but now you feel that i'm giving up...
so you want me to carry on or tone down...?
this is the part i really don't know what to do, you get what i mean?
or even feel how i feel deep in me?

2008-05-13T00:29:00.002+08:00

is either you care, you might get hurt,
or you don't care much, she get hurt.

am i over-caring or i had stepped into your territory?

2008-05-11T23:02:00.000+08:00

I really have no mood today.
Headache attacking me non-stop for a lot of days.

Am i taken for granted?
or
I need more room for improvement/s?

Is it men are not suppose to understand women?

2008-05-11T09:40:00.001+08:00

Sometimes wanting to see her smile, see her grow healthy, staying off from trouble and illness. But all and all, i'm like not doing fine. It's seems like i'm making worse and worsen. I really don't know how to help us.
When you don't care, they expect you to care. I really care a lot from my true heart. Caring too much, make me feel that I'm over caring. When i want to voice out my feeling, i will somehow controlling my emotions. But usually i will speak out fast as i always told her to voice out, if she have feeling with her. Am i too "big man" or what is happening?
I'm trying to think of solutions to ease our hurts. But i don't how cause she don't say anything or react anything to me. Right now, i'm keep guessing and thinking. It's been on my mind for a few days and every time this same kind of issue happened.
The speechless from you, really hurt me a lot when things are not right. I don't wish you to ease me all the while. If you think you are right then you ease me, but not forcing yourself.
有时，不是要不要 give in. But, 应不应该 give in.

Sometimes people really care a lot from their heart. Care too much and no one take it, people will tend to get very tired. Eventually people might even give out. Perhaps voicing out is the best way to help one another.
Tired will just make our love tone down and stop moving off well. That's how i feel, how about you?

I believe that we can't make peace and smooth sailing in relationship, if this kind issue keep happening as you know that you will fall sick easily or maybe more.
I really need your hand to make us clap in a long way in our relationship.
This will carry on non-stop. And i believe it's not healthy to have it between us, but i don't know how you think... I have no idea

In life, it is just like that. How to solve solutions?
People speak out, people think why this thing happen, how to solve it with the best solution. Follow by the action that make both parties happy.
Women love guessing games.
Most often, Men hate guessing games.
Women love to be understand by Men.
Most often, Men are the one who are not understand by Women.

girls' do, boys' don't

2008-02-24T01:58:00.000+08:00

no blogging cause lots of stuff in me, i can't say. some stuff in me are not to leak out, so i rather to remain silent.

i have nothing to say as i feel i demand too much. think i should really settle down and not to think too much. you are who you are, and i not suppose to change you. unless is all by nature.
just hoping and trying to make it right but i think i screw it up.

girls' do, boys' don't
maybe girls really need more attention but boys don't. more care and tender to girl but boy don't i suppose.

sometimes peer pressure around really can't control what is inside yourself. this plus 1 months, i think my brain improve a lot. think fast, act faster, reaction good and more more.. with all those, i can't control myself well when it's talking about emotions. wanting to clear and show mine but i don't know how can i express. seems like know one feel my present when i was down.

sometimes really only myself dealing it.
no one can live an island. i'm at the island now?

Because of me

2008-02-09T12:16:00.000+08:00

because of me as a cause. so, that's where i had affected you and even hurt you. it's really due to my negligence. i'm so sorry to hurt u once again.
sorry for being so harsh and strict nowadays. sometimes it's very hard to tune myself back from here to there. but i'm trying hard.
so sorry my love :(

alike?

2007-12-26T01:43:00.000+08:00

i feel like i'm "auntie yang".
i'm almost quite like him. watching "auntie yang", gives me the feeling i'm so him.
useless and not useful at as. only can give people insecurity and always gives disappointment to people.
i really can't ease and suit people. who's my scanner?
am i that bad... who can tell me how to improve myself?

anyone knows that why i don't have mood for x'mas?
friends will ask me out for sure. and not forgotten, it's my mum's birthday. Past few years since she moved to hougang, she always want and wish me to accompany her on her birthday. she don't care about my time on the 25th. and all i can say, past few years i didn't enjoy my x'mas cause i always ended up hurting someone. this year also the same, and this is why i have no mood for it.
i love x'mas cause it's fun for sure, but i think i can't have the chance to try the real fun.

2007-12-06T16:44:00.000+08:00

hehee~*
what can i say?
i'm in love! wahahaa!
it's great and very happy to have you..
love ya deep deep. always want to hug u tight tight!
hAnsIoNg~* O GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
learn giving is better than recieving

am i weak?

2007-11-19T16:49:00.000+08:00

Maybe 10 months love is still fragile. I never have such a long relationship before.
Maybe i'm too impatient and cause you suffocated. Sometimes, we are good but sometimes i can feel it's unstable. Like i don't know how you feel... And parts in you, i really don't know well. Like quite a distance away.
Only way to know you well most of the time is through blog..
How can i know you better? through blog again and again??

Who knows?

2007-11-19T01:24:00.000+08:00

It's so annoying when things always don't get in the way that you wish. If i'm demanding then i shouldn't be too demanding. If the things are not due to too demanding, how?
Really and it's always very very annoying when i walking towards my door. Every time i insert my key into my door lock, i will think of my grandmother's face and their "cool" characters. Every time when i reach home around 10 plus, i will always think "whether my dad is sleeping?". Different time played different "cool" door gift for me. The best time when i go home is that my windows are closed, that means "no one at home".
Sometimes i think and think... Why i have this kind of father? He is not a bad guy, just that i can't stand him. I can't see anything i appreciate him a lot. I totally admit, when i was young, my dad was my role model and i want to be someone life him. That was back then. Right now, it's different story.
I even think and flashback a lot, like who is the one who enlighten me when i met obstacle courses in life. You know who? Those were my friends. Even they always gave rubbish talks just trying to help me, i really appreciated it. Most of the time, it was all through observations and long thinking's. With that, i leaded my life.
So what are the roles for being father and mother??
I can't see anyone is performing them until now. I feel that life was just so alone, lonely, solo-mode through my mid primary until recently.
This "recently" hit a deep impact in my life. A new phase in not only my life. It's our life, our journey, our story to show our next generations. Just that...
Just that i think it's so unfair for her. It's like i can't give her the proper, yet "burdens" are keep happening to her. I had been walking alone this few years even i happen to have lot of ex-girlfriends before. But those don't gave me the real feel like what we have! I really feel life was so unpleasant to travel around, getting to understand life and learning to mould myself to be a right man to be. Right now, i'm not alone moving around. I'm in double mode! I have you now and you are the one that i really concern a lot.
Thinking of the welfare i'm giving are right a not, more that enough, more to cover and more i suppose.
I don't blog much. Cause blog is a place that most of the time i throw in things that i can't handle much. I have a lot to voice out but i don't know where am i know..

***********************************************

I'm very glad that people are slowly taking me in. The "people" i'm mentioning, they are my future family. I'm very happy and heart is pumping with new blood. About this, i have a lot to say and say but i don't what to say cause i'm really so happy. Since bbq, i'm so in the Hehe-mode. I feel so in the circle of trust and being loved!! I must work harder to show that she really choose me right.
hAnsIoNg~* O GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
honeymoon will be lovely and the best moment in life

72days down to go...

2007-10-29T00:15:00.000+08:00

perhaps i didn't treat you nice enough.
perhaps my care for you is not enough..
i know you care just that you don't express out...
never mind, i will try to master my mind reading skill....
maybe sometimes is nice that, you tell me how you feel.....

Even though, i still have 2 months before i enlisted. Every time i think ahead, i will feel very don't what to do. Like my life will miss something and feel that i have tonnes of things haven't do.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
honeymoon

How can i ease you?

2007-10-27T01:33:00.000+08:00

I just realize my absent with make you feel sad.
I always though sometimes my absent is not so important. 7 weeks of BMT will end soon. Just hope this few days, 74 days, we can spent more together. But hope you will study more and don't wish to see you neglect your studies. Always see you so restless, speechless like having words in your mouth that you can't speak out.
Recently i can't see the cheerful side of you, which make me feel that i failed on my duties..
Looking forward for honeymoon..

2007-10-06T20:48:00.000+08:00

Hoping just don't keep matters to one party,
One party is just like walking alone in this relationship,
Overall it's belong to both parties,
Yours and mine..

The 6th day of this month

2007-10-06T19:26:00.000+08:00

Well well well.. Early in the morning went to lot of places. Ate the curry rice, play lan-game and even eat beancurd supper supper. It's quite fun but my mood is just so and so.
After that, i had my Ai xin lunch from my love love.. So yummy but i was too full to eat them up plus i just woke up.

Well, time to get enlisted soon.
Karma to me, i'm joining Police Force. Why karma, cause i don't wish to wear blue but i'm going too soon. 1, 2, 3, 4.. Left, Right, Left..!!

You are giving enough and i'm very happy that you dedicated so much to me. I just don't wish to see you struggle your daily life like what you have now.. Thinking about money issue, rushing to school and more. Maybe sometimes you really spent too much with me and stay up with me too late till you have no own time to study. Please tell me if we are and keep it to yourself.
Sometimes you really have no time, i understand that's why i never say anything. Just that sometimes i'm worrying for you too. Worrying why phone is not ringing, is it hanging or more.. Worrying whether you have your meal soon or are you skipping it that might make you feel sick. Sometimes skipping meals cause no time i know but ... You also got to know your condition too. If you never eat, what might happen? I don't wish be someone like me dad who demand so much on people. I hate the feeling..
If you really have no time or don't wish to talk, you can either drop me a call or drop a sms to me. At least i know what is happening out of my circle. I know the hard times you are having in school and i really understand. Not just the word "understand" and i really do. Maybe just a 10 sec call of telling me what's up or sms will be fine. But all up to you..
Sometimes what you really need or more, hope you share with me...
Sometimes it's so hurt and disappointed on myself that i only get to know and understand you more when you blog it. As in understand your thinking and your heart.
I know what i had said, all this might make you sad and hurt too..
But i can't image if we have gap time in between us that we can't chat much like when i get enlisted..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Enlistment is it a help to me or a worsen issue for future life?

Are you calling?

2007-10-05T11:57:00.000+08:00

Nowadays where are you?
I always waiting for your call when you said you calling me when you are done..
But it's always done, done done, done done done that i might have someone by my ear..
I know you are pushing hard in studies that why i don't invade into your school time.
Still.... ....
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
cellphon is to dail to someone who waiting for your call?

senses

2007-10-04T23:30:00.000+08:00

part of my senses...
i feeling so by myself.
where, where are you?
just now phone rang, i thought was you.
nah, is chenjie asking me to go his house to watch baseball match till morning..
dot dot dot dot dot...

HOME

2007-10-04T22:14:00.000+08:00

Home. A place to called home. Where is it?
I don't really feel i'm home.
Is it just more to a shelter to me or what is it?

Everything before i step into my house, i will think of my grandma's face and her annoying expression. And what, i need to endure with it.. Sometimes you flashback all the images of what had happened recently. All those feeling were just so piece of yucks.
round late dinner time, it's the standard time that my dad usually reach home.
"Weeeeee" My dad is home!! So what??? He will try to talk to me but... All and all, he just talk back the same old stuffs. Which is, nag and nag about do this, do that, why i like that and more and more... Wow... i'm so sick of it and tired. Staying at home really kills me sometimes. Now i'm boiling up also. My boiled is just inside me whereby it's harmless to people. Sometimes too much of these "fun", i just irritated and even moody whereby i feel so lost.
Is it i expect too much in life?? Sometimes i need people to correct my mistakes if i'm wrong..
Is it i have fault like not behaving well?? So tired of it...
Say say say, tell me more man...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
in front of at least 12 hrs, my "mac" desktop

The day after Children's day

2007-10-02T22:36:00.000+08:00

No longer labeled under children anymore. The feeling labeled not under children must pay a price too.. Like Ez-link card!! Today is my 2nd day of adults fare and i was kind of screwed up with it.. I had boarded twice the same bus and i forgot to tap it. It's so expensive when you didn't tap to alight.
Oh no no.. Who can remind me? My memory really so poor...
Gosh~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Tap in, Tap out and it's so EX!!

M y b a d

2007-09-29T23:21:00.000+08:00

Think i'm really very bad.. Firstly, when i'm at home, i always tend to skip my lunch. When i skip it, it's just that i'm totally not hungry. If i'm hungry, i'll surely eat my meal.
Maybe part of my daily life habits, i'm still very use to it. I should learn to change it. When i say what, it's just all excuses from others.
I feel so bad, i hurt her as i kept skipping lunch this few days.
I'm very sorry, i was kind lost and don't what to say. I have no way to redeem myself..
What i can do is to look down and say "sorry".

"Sometimes when you are hurt, who knows your feelings and who cares?
Sometimes you must let and share you feelings out to another.
If the one you had shared don't care, it's just his/her bad.
Learning to give in and understand takes lot of time."

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前在我脸上依旧清晰可见
最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
回忆的画面
在荡着秋千
梦开始不甜
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变你走过的世界
你用你的指尖
阻止我说再见
想象你在身边
在完全失去之前
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋
这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现
这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡

hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
my bad, with any chance to redeem

Good Morning

2007-09-27T11:53:00.000+08:00

Yawnzz..
Today's morning was so "xin fu". Waking up and have a breakfast in front of me.. Love love bought me my favourite breakfast from Yishun. Can you image..? travel from yishun to hougang, just to deliver breakfast to your love one. So sweet of her..
The breakfast melts in my heart till now.. With this yummy breakfast keep making me flashback and think of that moment.
I'm not very "xin fu" to have breakfast in the morning. It's about how you have the breakfast and who you having it with..
It's so "xin fu" to have you with me..
Love ya deep deep~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
loving breakfast i just had, yummie~*

B vs B

2007-09-26T16:15:00.000+08:00

Blogger vs Broker.

I'm kind of regular blogger recently cause i'm sometimes too bored and don't who to talk to. I'm too bored and tired of handling stuff. Recently i don't even play my online game that usually i will play at least an hour a day. This 3 to 4 days, i don't even really play it. Too bored.
I'm broker as in i'm going to get broke soon because coming 2 months, November and December i might not have income coming in. That's my broking part soon.

The whole day from late morning until now. I don't even play online game. I just look at my computer like the computer can talk to me. Maybe i was waiting for something to happen.
People says surfing internet are "bo liao". But if you think again...
"Why you keep surfing net when you really have nothing to do"
Reason very simple, you're really "bo liao".

Alright it's 4.22pm now. Time to get going for tuition at 5pm now...
Work work work time...
And i'm waiting for your call >.<
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
mooncake day with just myself munching it

Chinese15th

2007-09-25T21:42:00.000+08:00

Chinese calender, 15th.
Oh no! it's full moon, is it werewolf coming out???
Nah.. Not that, maybe happen during movie only.. Not vampire too ^^

It's Mooncake Festival. Ho-rayyyy!
This year is special. I have no night outing to play candles and more funs. But i know it's quite childish for someone to play those with age now. I like to play is not because it's fun. It's just that i'm bored at home and i wish to have some fun out. The fun is not that how cool or interesting when you're playing it, it's all the smiles from little kids when they have so much fun.
This year quite fun too. I had it in my room. Eating mooncakes, hot tea from China with my painful and irritating left eye. Well, no more my favourite. No more snow skin mooncake. Sob~*

Today just ended all my subjects for driving. I realize something that is some instructors are so irritating too.. Don't know. But they are just so like that "toot", opsss~* Cancel a few revisions for driving and push then all near the Test Date because i believe when test coming then do more and more to brush myself! As in get more use to it. Humans always very easy lost sense of feelings. No feel, no sight equals to Lost~!!

I'm still not enlist for national service. I wish to go in as soon as possible.
But, but, but...
I also wish to stay longer right now. I have my Car Test on December and i wish to clear it before enter to National Service. One more thing is, i wish to stay, accompany and spend more time together.
Every day by day, time is just running up.. I keep feeling, i don't have time for you soon..
Goods and bads i suppose..

I had more to said in the morning but i had forgotten all.
Aging sign i suppose... Gosh~*

September 24, 2007

Where had i gone to..?
My dearest love love fulfill my wish and we went to Sentosa. Lucky i listened to her and we went in to Sentosa to have my beach lunch. Facing the sea with Bah Ku Teh mee sua and Drunken pork with egg. Laying down on beach, playing with water and build sand castle were so fun. Actually i think we can build more but due to the after rain sun. Wow.. It's so hot, like glazed donut! Hehe~* We went for Skyride and Luge twice and it was FOC. FOC, Free of Charge!!
All thank to Kiekie's Mum! She gave us free lunch and FOC Skyride and Luge. We saved up alot alot yesterday and we were so happy!!
Humph.. So when can we go again??

Perhaps i need to take rest first.
Mookcake Time..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
mooncake day with just myself munching it

I'm Added

2007-09-23T23:22:00.000+08:00

Today is S U N D A Y.
Not really SUNday. Early in the morning and we had heavily pouring raining from the sky. Thank to my "dearest" mama, still drag me out to accompany her to work cum getting her daily products. Lot of items we had bought and i'm the one who carried home. By the way, she spent $100.04 just in the morning. Ouch! That's expensive. Actually it's not that expensive, just because of greed for getting some offers. She therefore fork up the price to $100. Aunts are all like this kind, due to offers, don't even mind to throw in hers' "life".

It's like we had long long time didn't meet up and times actually past very fast. Without you, i can even hear the clock ticking.
Sinful!!! We ate "mutton" soup an "mutton" noodle. I think it's not a bad food for you but i think you scared of beef now. Ops.. I said something out!!
Let's talk dinner.. We had lots of rojak food. Cup noodle, chunky soup(yummy), rum and raisin ice-cream, orange juice, japanese green tea pancake and mochi! WAhaha~*
Today is just so sinful~*

Yaya.. By the way, someone finally added me in her Photo Gallery.
Not bad.. I'm finally exist in her friendster. WeeeeeeEEeee~~**
But where's my comment? Aiyoo, still need to ask... Where's her sincere?
Sob sob~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Even same wish never come true, but i believe u own it now ^^

2007-09-22T22:29:00.000+08:00

I think i'm not so that smart and capable to ease everyone.
I can't ease your demands most off the time. I feel so bad and disappointed of myself.
Even hurt sometimes... I don't how to ease you too..
I'm so in such a lost kid..

Tell me how, how....

Comments 52.

2007-09-22T20:56:00.000+08:00

Comments 52.

Life is not simple when you don't have right one by your side. Finding, hunting and grabbing are not easy. Sometimes it's base in fate!
Always awaiting for someone when you cross the bridge? It's hurt when this always can't get through..

I never get finding and hunting.
Now i know, i also kept waiting and the waiting moments are all worth..
Love is in the air~*

Now i got to go to meet my mum. Well, today my day is called "waiting".
Waiting to call you, waiting for your call, waiting for the time to reach and i to make a move, waiting and waiting.. I'm not sad or feel depressed. I just want to let you know i also wait for you and wait for the moments to get together. I'm simple and don't expect much, just hope things will be fine for you without troubles.
Sorry i can't wait for you till your reach home. I need to make a move to find my troublesome mama. I still waiting for your call..
想你~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Even same wish never come true, but i believe u own it now ^^

Days are coming...

2007-09-21T20:13:00.000+08:00

A lot of things are coming. On the another hand, i didn't keep track and follow up. I'm just so me, remember all events. Sometimes i need some upgrade in my brain storage.

Days really coming??

Oh ya, like every month day (not period), Traffic Police test, Enlistment and more that i can't think of it... Enlistment is the worst thing that i keep wanting to know. If i don't know when is my enlistment date, i can't plan a lot of things. Like Traffic Police, i'm not intending to push forward but i can't assume i can go for it on 22nd Dec because i might get enlisted around the corner. Everyday keep worrying..
The hated feeling of driving. When i drive, i don't feel any fun in it. Not proud in driving too. Just want have the feeling getting rid of it. Beside that i hate the choices i had for myself. Like getting basket instructors. Some are good, some are worst.
Working world is just pass money around from more pay to lesser pay. Some people just take money and forget their roles in their work. Professionalism are gone!! That's bad! No wonder each company have lots of contact for employees. With this, trust is gone in workers.

I just found something. Something cool and WOW!!
A new handphone! The camera is really cool and awesome..
It's Sony Ericsson phone, K850 [5 mega pixels]
Want to know more check this link
http://www.gsmarena.com/sony_ericsson_k850-2003.php

Wonder when can i get it? Going National Service how to bring camera phone.
Oh no it's really awesome, yEaHHhh~**
And i still can't find a phone that has no camera.
DiaoZZzzz 0. o"
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Love is in the air~*

the first set

2007-09-16T00:34:00.000+08:00

Wedding dinner is not very nice. The food are not very nice with too much salt, service standard very poor and the red wine like so...
But but but what was important, was that the couple really step in the ballroom and officially declared married!! So sweet~* Guess what? I saw yan xing, peiqi's future husband. The world is still so small.

Why why why? Why she married so early?
People will think whether she was shotgun? She don't know how to think? Her husband forced her? No no no.. All are wrong!! I never expect is that she got married cause of her father. Her father is about to pass away soon with few more months living in the world. She trying to grant her father and make him happy. She's really a very nice and mature.
Once again, Gong Xi Jerry and Colleen.
All the best with bright future~*

Everyone everyone have their reasons when they decide to get real engage.
Immediately, i think about myself. Myself in the future.. Somehow i don't dare to look far cause partly it's too early to see it with lots of hope. So just move on till the day reach. What i know is that i need to save up for wedding soon.
Seeing wedding couple is so Wow!! And surely it's another new chapter in them too.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Love is in the air~*

Is me and you..

2007-09-14T15:02:00.000+08:00

Is.. is.. is me and you~*
Time really passes very fast. Lucky 7th arriving soon.. 7th month just past and sweetie 7 months just going to step into us. It's so amazing, isn't it? Arhh.. Don't think you get what i mean.. But who's care?
Can say much if not the "secret" will just lead out.. Hush hush will do ^^

I'm really adult now? I think so.. People around starting to build their own kingdom. Isn't it too early to start now as we are still young? Some or huge pool of my friends got married because of shotgun. If it's not about shotgun, isn't it too early?
Everyone in life have different perceptions i suppose. Even a couple with also have their individual perceptions. Somehow it's not very easy to match up.. But to try matching up like sudoku.
Tomorrow I will be attending my friend's wedding. It's my first time attending wedding whereby the bride is my secondary classmate. Interesting~*

Maybe i'm really growing adults that i need to bring out my own expenditure. Sometimes we might know that this party is doing something and making you to make lose. You know and you don't want to care much to purse for the issue.
Why like this?
Maybe you don't wish to talk much? Or the party is your close one? Or or more?
Kins always make things worst in life. That's what i observe in mine and that i'm tired to talk much in family. I just lead on neutral at home. But how can i make these nonsense to go off?
What i can think is to build a good and peaceful with lots of love kingdom with my partner. (you know who you are :))

I can't lots of stuff right now. I'm really stuck like sitting duck. I can't continue study to build up my career, can't move and make plans in life. I'm really stuck now. National Service is really an important issue for mankind to protect their families. Too bad, somehow ours are slow in processing people to get enlist.
Faster i can get enlisted, the best it's for me. But i can't bear to have the feeling of apart.
Life somehow isn't very smooth when you are just that rough.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
u are my cinderella ella ella eh eh eh, can we eat wadever?

Timetable

2007-09-06T22:24:00.000+08:00

My life now is like a timetable.
Meals time, bathe time, reach home time, sleep time, drive car time and more. All are about same! It's just like same process day by day. Everyday i just feel so tired and exhausted. Like now, my eyes are so tired and sleepy. I can't even enjoy my game that i use to play everyday. I just login and see see look look in the game for around 15 minutes. That 15 minutes always allowed me to say "Okay, i can't take it anymore. Not plating anymore. Boring!!"
Everyday, i drive and drive, "drift" and "drift".. It's all so boring! Seriously i miss my bikes' life.
Can you imaging how comfortable you will be when you are cruising around on bike with natural air blowing at you.. i can say the feeling is amazing and more..
Maybe what people always like to say, "Once in a lifetime is enough."

Hehe... 2 fun stuff had happened!!
Firstly, i got a present from auntie jennifer. She gave me a pack of chocolate and it's my favorite favour, peppermint!!

My Teachers' Day Present

Secondly...
Guess what?? It's about a story of Pineapples Tarts.
Do you know the story? Some said Pineapples tarts can bring loves and kins closer!!
Wei lai lao bu trying to accepting me, i think. I'll do my best!!
Yan wen is MINE!!! WAHAHAHA~*

Way to go!! POH PU POH PU!!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
u are my cinderella ella ella eh eh eh, can we eat wadever?

a n y thing

2007-08-30T15:25:00.000+08:00

I know you promised, i know you the trust.
Somehow things doesn't go nice and smooth when someone who really care and trying to ask something and either one of us say "Like that lor". Really kind of hurt and don't know what to react to it. It's like trying to care for someone and ended up got rejected.
I'm don't what to say and feel. Just having like feeling that it's better for me just to be silence.
Kind of hurt when you try to love but being repel to one side..

LG, Life Good

2007-08-24T21:00:00.000+08:00

LG, life good? How do you measure whether life is good?
Is it everything working on your side, you found a real partner, begin praise by people or people look up on you? Ya ya, or even you scored high in your exam and blah blah blah?
Nah, well not exactly i think.
In life, everything will just happen in anytime. The simple way to make things happen are actions. A simple action you make can cause something to change. Actions in life makes people thinks and react to it. A lot of things are happening right now, even I'm sitting down touching my keyboard. Others are just leading there life. All of above are just some thinkings in me..
I dislike people miss understand me, i hate it a lot. Just like weihao, he is just nasty sometimes but overall he is a nice guy too. I can't make it for the supper today. It's not that i lazy to travel to chomp chomp where they had just changed of plan. He always have a thinking that I like to hop on their cars when we are going for supper. He will be thinking, "If we have no car, hansiong is not going for supper. he just walk to have a ride to eat and home." And check out what he said when i told him i can't go.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) said:
hey u there?
i can't walk well
sry i can't go today..
my right ankle n knee is hurting me
roti prata man says (8:56 PM):
whatever la.
you go tell yankai.
Is just that my knee really hurt and pain. Seriously i might fall when I'm walking even though i have legs. My right is just just not me..
i just dislike people don't trust me and doubts me. I don't know how to judge my life. Family, friends, educational levels and more.. All are so messy when time pass by. What i know right now, i have someone who i can trust the most and i deep into her. It's very stable, just that sometimes i feel a bit not on right side. I still feel some unspoken things between us..

I can say my life is good as I'm alive moving around parts of the world.
saranghaeyo da zhu~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
u are my cinderella ella ella eh eh eh, can we eat popeye?

Fate

2007-08-11T00:50:00.000+08:00

Singapore is small but to meet your friends are just not so easy like ABC. After so many years with no contact just maybe sms and msn. Guess what, we met up.. Just so surprise to being caught. Friends from National Camp and guess what again.. The day we met today is just nice. 5 years had past like snap on our fingers. When 5 years ago, we were in camp and now here we are.. All are called "Fate".
Sometimes i have enough, i think i just take it and don't think much. Perhaps, giving in will be nice with lots of learning to take in..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
tonight... i celebrate my love for you...and tml too...and the day aft too....and forever too....

pending mode

2007-08-10T13:55:00.000+08:00

Well. it's quite cool wait for someone when you are sitting in a crowd of people who you don't know. i'm just like an actor now. acting like a student who are part of their "schoolmates". quite insteresting too. idling while pending.. pending for the goonzu to download and get patch up which is around 1 hour of patch at least i suppose. i having nothing to do but to blog. blogging now is just like i'm having someone to talk to. didn't want to sms her cause i don't wish to "chop" in while you are study even though i have the urge to press my cellphone. it's around 20 minutes and the patch is around 10%. good game then.. one more thing i'm waiting beside waiting for her. i'm waiting for the laptop so go sayonara soon. what i can say that, it's running out of "petrol" soon but there're no nearest "petrol" stations.
nothing to surf, nothing to think of. staring on this screen is the best right now. and it's great that i'm feeling so relax now.. get well soon...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
tonight... i celebrate my love for you...and tml too...and the day aft too....and forever too....

will or will not...

2007-08-04T12:53:00.000+08:00

Counting down... I'm not make to be a countdown timer. Just that my heart and brain are working in this way. Usually counting down for the next moment where we can meet again. But, now is counting down for the day that we can't meet often.. For this, there are goods and bads in it.. I will rather take the bads than goods..
I have nothing to say cause I'm still a timer now. Kept ticking non-stop. It's only stop when i was sleeping, i supposed.
Will things move or fall to dark side? Will, will not? I believe in you but I'm just too lack off confidence..
Let's see how...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
tonight... i celebrate my love for you...and tml too...and the day aft too....and forever too....

The day after yesterday

2007-08-01T08:09:00.000+08:00

The day after yesterday is actually today. Today is is just another day of mine, yours and ourselves. Everyone share the same day. We might meet each other, even though we are just a passerby pedestrian. I can't make my life by myself, it's always about us. Us who carry out our daily life.
Wedsenday is just another day that we will have every seven day. So what is this day so special? Well, i remembered my usual Wedsenday were about, leaving school early, have assembly, the day that going to weekend soon and more.. Everything are more like idling thinkings. It's more i need to get moving and start to warm up my life. Thinking about future, I'm like just a sitting duck whereby I don't know how to start or to choose. Maybe more decisions are to be make soon. Soon or later, my doubts will appear and tick in my checklist.
Talk about Wedsenday, what am I going to have? No idea?
Hey hey, it's time for "Don don don, 1 2 3, We are Kuishin-bo"
Time to showdown. Erm.., well it's more about fattening for sure!
SIN SIN SIN... What to do? I'm full of sins... keke~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

Long little Wednesday

2007-07-18T08:12:00.000+08:00

Well, now i know that even a mankind need motivation to get to sleep. Without motivation, you have have no idea that why you are sleeping for. Seems like everything you want to do, there are always tonnes of reasons behind it, even though it might sound stupid and childish.

The Wednesday of 18 July isn't so cool. It's going to rain soon as it's reported from Radio Station. Everyone rushing to work and it's started to jam from 7.20am with the Bus-Lane flood with vehicles. Almost half population of people aheading and rushing to school. Someone who have family problem and can't reslove i supposed as i heard lots of shouting and quarrelling, a student i suppose, he/she jumped and landed on the ground with a school bag placing near his/her body. Life isn't that easy on people. It's about give and take, i believe understanding and caring plays a important role, unless Love is destory in mankind. Overall, by narrowing into myself, i don't think Wednesday is my cup of tea. Whereby, i don't not what to do during my day and night. Missing and missing are all in my mind. What i'm awaiting is to wait for the day that i can see you, feel you and have a sense of belonging.

Stupid and childish are something that human will get agitated about it. Nevertheless, it are part of emotions that a mankind is trying to deliver his/her message to another mankind. I suppose that even what type of emtions or attidudes the mankind shows out, it is all because he/she care. If someone don't care or anything, he/she will not consume so much energy to show his/her emotions or attidudes.

Fingers off keyboard. Back to lesson time!!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

who? who ask?

2007-07-11T23:42:00.000+08:00

Dry till i have a disable eyes. I can't see well with this eyes from the start of the day. walking around with dis-hearted soul. From the start, i don't what i was doing or making my way.. It's just so lost in my ways. It's seems like no one care for me. Perhaps i am just a weird creature that no one care to understand me and feel me.. >.<... *sob tsk sob*

who?
who knows my feeling?
who?
who even ask how to feeling?
who?
who really care to touch my heart?
who?
who really try to ease me?
who?
who will take me out and bring me out?

who? who? who will?
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
tonight... i celebrate my love for you...and tml too...and the day aft too....and forever too....
raw eyes, powder heart, losing life

2007-07-10T23:33:00.000+08:00

i sitting in front of my computer, kept thinking what happen just now.. Kept saying why why why! I'm like totally gone now. Don't know what to do next, no idea how to face life in my family. I'm just very trouble how to talk to them. Some say this, some say that.. No one always give me a secure life, i always have doubts in life. i'm really a low esteem person that don't dare to face life. i dont wish to be like 6 years ago, having a mother exist in the world but see her, i i walk off cause i sacred. Right now, this thing is like going to happen again. How must i react to it? My life is like having a face and mother but don't who to fall on. I really tired... No one really understand me. All say they know they know.. But i really don't think..
Do you know your son?
i hate wearing mask around..
Anyone know me deep inside?
So everything that come wrong are on them or ME?
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
tonight... i celebrate my love for you...and tml too...and the day aft too....and forever too....
raw eyes, powder heart, losing life

sometimes

2007-07-02T23:47:00.000+08:00

Sometimes so near yet so far..
I might be just hugging her right now and we are just that close like sticky glue. On the another hand, i don't know what she is thinking and even how she feels toward some certain issues. I wish to know her better, just like we are 2 in 1. But right now, i'm thinking that with this mindset of mine, i'm disturbing her privacy. Well, i dunno what to do now.. I felt lousy in some point of life when i don't know how she is feeling and some more i'm her boyfriend or even future husband.
Well... Not easy and it's so hard to know when heart is pumping, mind is working and mouth is unspoken.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Robots c," )

Calling it..

2007-06-04T12:31:00.000+08:00

After a few days of rains and shines. Everything had come to the end. We are fine right now.. Weeeeeeeeee Sometimes life shouldn't take it too hard. For me, i think my weakness is that i take things too seriously. I need and should have some enlightenment.
After this few weeks and months, life isn't great at all. Everyone are going army or continuing their upgrading for better future career. I'm right now a sitting duck. Just to follow my life till i get enlisted. Kept being delaying and delaying, i feel like my life are keep wasting and draggy. This part of my life is called "thrashing".
Lets make a turning point of looking into my life. *Rotating* Life isn't that bad and worse that i keep thinking after all. Having a new life, that is having you. obviously and not bluffing Because of you, you brighten my each day that even moonlight can "shine" at me. *Hot*
Hoping to get a new chapter soon which is enlist to army. On the other hand, i hope this part of life will last longer. So much time to spent together. Eventually, sooner or later, it will end soon as sweet moments always fly real fast. I wondering when will be our next moment of life that having such a relaxing life for spending together. Busy life also good too since my dearest Aiai loves urban life which gives stress.
Together, we must slowly explore into it and build our future with giant bathtub with surfing duckies. 2 contracts are running but it's weird cause 2nd contract fall on the 4th year, 5th year or 7th year?
Wow... Blur
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Right after rain & shine, nice weather!

Where i stand?

2007-05-31T19:54:00.000+08:00

Am i standing across the ocean from you?
After a distance of journey together. I felt that i'm very useless and dumb. I felt i'm really a standby boyfriend from now on. To me, i hate myself for being an "im-important" person and a person that she can't fall on.. My heart fall once again. Shattering and crying in my heart.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
i'm just peeling off, u know?

sen si tiv ity lev el?

2007-05-31T01:14:00.000+08:00

I didn't think that you will leave me as I hate to think of it and i don't know why i dreamed of that. Don't know why and still keep thinking about what she said 2 days ago. The sentences that she delivered was so misty but my heart is peeling off every second. Feeling just like a stinky junk. Can't sleep right now, kept having the "dunno" feeling. ? Can't be that i must say out everything i feel as she don't know and understand what i mean. No one understand too. Maybe i'm just a sensitive person. Every time on phone, we are so close yet so far. It's getting even further right now, silent is what i recall through out our conventions. The messages that i sent, ended up coming back with no feedback. That's like i'm talking to myself once again and again. Am i such an im-important person? neglect, neglecting, neglected or hopeless?
Tell me more tell me more,
to make myself a workable, a known person and just a little tiny living thing that she know i'm still exist in some part of her world.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
want a imperfect tour package, Nah! Who will like it?

Dunno Post

2007-05-29T23:08:00.000+08:00

Guys also have 2 things that troubles them up side down. It's just like a standard package with the mixture of lady and money.
Nobody is perfect. Am i that nobody?
I just so unknown to mankind, helpless that no one senses me and imperfect package. Sometimes words are so hurt that it gave you a deep impact and make you turn into shit. Not about self esteem or what, it's about which sender send to which receiver.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
want a imperfect tour package, Nah! Who will like it?

Freeloader

2007-05-27T14:41:00.000+08:00

Days over mum's house are fun.. Lots of freedom but kind of loner. I used to be loner but even since i have her. My life have changed. I can't be loner anymore. Life without her is just so gone. Don't know where to go, what to do, how to start my things and more..
I'm not anymore a loner but i'm fixed to be a sticker that stick real tight to her.
爱爱, you are the one that give me the energy to move on.
Well, we will get a bathtub soon and i still have the feeling that... (hope i forgotten what i'm thinking right now)

Ya.. Let me show you my lunch!

<--1st dish
Creamy tomato lava in "Peas" off the shorty logs

<--2nd dish
The flaming shark meat's fins with thousand mush-house

Wahaha! not bad right! But kind of reddish and not tempting to me.. But i will just finish it off! This can be a warning to you.. Now you know my standard, so be careful with my cook. Oh ya! It's called "cook" not "book". ^^
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Living alone with no idea what i'm wishing for!*

2007-05-26T00:57:00.000+08:00

Don't wish to blog and i have no comments!

-unknown-

2007-05-21T20:45:00.000+08:00

the amount of speeches that we deliver to one another gives me the feeling that we are rather more to stranger than kin. not good in brainstorming about cause and effect, so please lead me to the answer. or perhaps my mind drove me off shore or....
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
beat, beating, ouchy

Isn't sweet at all..

2007-05-20T22:38:00.000+08:00

Dear diary, something new happen today..
the days stay in mama house brought me to my unwilling side of my life and those unwilling thoughts. It isn't that my mum's house bring me sad life, just that life always have some moments that bring you back to the sad parts or parts of life that you don't wish for. These are reasons that why this few day i didn't blog, due to this. If a person blog without express this own feelings, this really miserable. To me, i will just say it out cause blogging is a place i throw. One of reason not to blog is i don't want to have the flashback again. But i didn't escape from it and here i am.
Sorry that i'm not the fruity to you and can't give the best fruitful days that everyone in life wish for. I'm neither creative nor wonderful, just a piece of me that gives addition of bits and bits to life.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿 GhOsTmILK... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
beat, beating, ouchy

The miss posts for 5

2007-05-08T13:14:00.000+08:00

Had a long weekend of traveling here and there. Went down my grandparent's house on Sunday. I actually miss them a lot but always don't have the time to go down. Nice and great to see them when they give me their sweet smile. Their house always gives the warmest feeling, that the house i spent through my childhood moment. Traveling here and there, journey was long! Eventually, it's short after all as my dearest accompany through my journey. And last but not miss to mention, i had my yummy yummy chilli crab for my "dinner" with empty stomach.
Well, i can say the time pass fast. It's like zoom and zoomzzz. Oh, i think i too "good" boy. Oh no.. i miss school for 2 days and i don't think i can claim my reason for absent. Let see how on Wednesday?
Please don't scratch my love? It's like scratching off my love towards you...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
[Scratching Operation Failed]

"Sweaty" Journey back home

2007-05-03T22:40:00.001+08:00

As usual time to school, just that i was 10 minutes a bit earlier. Went to coffee shop for lunch cause canteen confirm crowd with "soil diggers". Then had it with Mr Sunny and Mr Yap with decent chat like where my friends now..?, how are they..?, so and so... i found that i had fall behind in school and lonely. Today just something different from my recent normal life. I walk passed Bus Interchange with a unwilling thoughts. Thinking "why am i heading to work but can't i go meet her? i wish to see her but i need the money too." I am that poor?, just due to cash flow.
Working is just a simple task but it will turn difficult task when you know that you are on the wrong place. I already know the job will not be that nice, pleasant and decent.. Indeed it was not! Quite a bit tough and nasty job when you are asking yourself; "Am i sweating or what?" It's all my sweat with rain drops when the start of my work time till end, even i had my dinner under drizzle weather. From the start, there is sheather at all. Carry and carry with lot of strength needed. The moment that you hungry, everything is fine to me. I even can squat down under a tree with rain drop on my food and have my dinner. Had my life a trash for that 6 hours. Life isn't that comfortable at all. Should think of others' before speaking out cause will have my turn?
Shouldn't say much anymore, should "pen" off..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
LOVE = L + O + V + E (Like a trash)

Lucky Draw

2007-04-30T23:21:00.000+08:00

Worst colour on Sunday? It' is Dark Blue! Gosh~* I got the "BEST" lucky draw! So cool and won't forget your face, Mr Chong Sin Yong. Hey Mr Chong, hope you have your karma soon.. Hope I won't see your face when you are working, better keep a distance from you. I think SBS hotline must give informations like who is driving the bus on that certain time.
Cabbed $13 after school to CMPB to settle my Army deferment, everything at CMPB is very fast and smoothed. Just that i spent a lot money on transportation and it's burn! *Fire in the Hole*
Eventually, all my pissES, pists, angerS, whatever and whatever went off... when i sense her and touch her. Everything are like WOOSH!! She is really cost a big impact in my life.. I don't how to tell her, think she knows...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
LOVE = L + O + V + E

Umbrella sanking!

2007-04-27T22:52:00.000+08:00

Umbrella the whole day like a grandpa. I like my style! Bugis street is quite nice. Hardly go there walk around cause Ah jiao wants to walk and i was after him. Singapore quite small, saw those year 2 students. I went to BOO them! Apparently, i was the one who got BOOO!
All the fundamental of Goonzu had changed, i feel so shitty now.. No drive, anymore!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
this is how sand gets blown by the wind
"go home and change" ?
Heart goes again, man overboard once again *sink sink sink sinkzzzz* Never mind, gotta to chill off once in awhile. Heart breaking, *cracking*..
Now is just a sitting duck. Just sleep whole day?
All effort gone?

Nights fall, Dawn arise.

2007-04-26T12:24:00.000+08:00

Sometimes your love one is too strong in keeping everything to herself and not letting hereslf to express it out. Therefore, always out dated of me will be the last one to get the informantions. Begin strong is great. Eventually too strong might lead to the world of "neglecting". Perhaps sometimes in life, human also need a little room for some breathing to let out her mind. Keeping everything to herself is liike having herself living in her own world. People who wish to live with her is thrown aside and they are not linking together, just like having some gaps in between.
Sometimes can't always be with you when you might need me.
I really wish to be your side not just physically but everything.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
sailing silently.

Chill day

2007-04-24T13:47:00.000+08:00

Sailing home with cooling breeze. Little ting drop of rains with cooling weather is totally nice and sweet. When sky going to fall with cooling breeze is just equally to my sorrow. Walking down stair with endurance and jaw closing up tightly isn't that fun after all. Recently my ankle is like getting back to "holiday season".
"Man over Board", will you safe me and warm me up once again. The ocean is too deep till i feel like am just a bypass fish and.. i don't know, just can letting myself to be "myself". I'm just floating about.
Just to endure. Endurance makes life move far!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
sailing silently.

The bus to home

2007-04-23T22:37:00.000+08:00

Journey was just so quiet down like campfire is going to end.
Or maybe am i too noisy person?
No matter i still on and by your side, no stepping in my dictionary.
I LOVE YOU 我爱你, 真的爱你！
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
sailing silently.

Slacking day after chalet

2007-04-22T19:07:00.000+08:00

Woo, the day before going to chalet was sure surprised to me. Only thought of accompanying 爱爱 to polyclinic cause it was a totally boring day if wait alone as i always did in the past. She told me she can go to Ah jiao's chalet. I was very happy but felt bad also as she forced herself to lie to her Tan lao ma. Sometimes her life with me towards her family is like a fake story to them. Life over the chalet is like so WOW. Over at chalet, all i can see is only her! I almost forgotten that i have friends around me, she is just like my whole life, my whole picture! Somehow i have a feeling i like control her freedom not to do this, not to do that but i just want to protect her from letting her to get hurt. Leaving there early with an unwilling and bad of me feelings cause it's my brother's birthday chalet. We took cab outside the chalet and we are smart. We alighted earlier and took bus home. We not even just save our pocket money and also have more time to be with one another.

Can you imaging that a girl that i knew long ago. You though she a hard person but she isn't like that and she just a lovely wife to be. You miss the biggest and greatest chance to know her deeper.
Qns: How will you feel?
Ans: I just grabbed mine and my chance just fall on me not long ago.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... OH MY OH MY! I AM SO DAMN NOT CUTE =) var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
innocent arh!!

It's yesterday once more

2007-04-17T13:04:00.000+08:00

Was my blue or awake?
New Page, new chapter, new life? By writing new story in your life, isn't it good to have new start with new colours in your life? A lot of people have much better and there are really good story. Too bad, i'm not a good writer. My story are not that Wow in life. Perhaps some "enrichment" is nice, but where to..?
Headed to school with lots of unspoken words. Looking at people around me with the "un"understanding minds towards them. Maybe it's in me. I'm a good writer in delaying life as i had lots of delay issues and i'm just tired of it. Kind of tired with misty surrounded. Such a good writer i am, who will buy my book? Or maybe i should be contented with mine? But saying content is just like giving myself excuse. "Excuse me, can you let me pass? I need this pass!"
Small eyes usually can't oversee far and it's usually fix for focusing "giant".
When will be my next delay moment... moment that i want to avoid from...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
big head with little arms, i love ang ku kueh!

The late post yet the sweetest

2007-04-15T13:24:00.000+08:00

She granted one of my wish and we headed to Sentosa. Weather Forecast said that chances of raining is 60% with thunder but with the trust of her, there were no rain except some pass-by dark clouds. We spent 3/4 of our afternoon slacking there and we were relax. The moment of no one can reach us was so wonderful as there were not a single technology stuff with us, even a clock for time check. Even though, everything was so quiet down there, my whole heart was full of sweet candid. After that we left the place where 2 months ago, that night, we stepped at here. Think again, we were covering the day shift for that 2 months ago as we had already covered our night shift. keke~* Not bad indeed! We had our wonderful dinner with our movie tickets in her wallet. The dinner really contained my stomach, no more ways to add more to my storage. Thanks to you, Carl's Junior. We smuggled our "Golden Village's" drink into movie hall, she "teaches" me bad or is it i was the one? Not long after our sotong's head feast, we headed home. even 855 travel one end to another but journey was like just that short. Oh no.. short? Reminder me that she said mine short too.. *tsktsk* Before we really departed once again where i don't wish too. Don't ask me why, cause i also don't why, it's just the feeling! Surprise me, she bought me rations. No wonder her bag so heavy, i felt so bad that she need to carry it the whole day. So sweet of her!! By the way, what are 爱心 biscuit? It's with me now ^^
Ending my day with full of dots and plasters.. Made a lot of wrong counted for dots. Finally got it, full of dots are 365.

365,
3 + 6 + 5 = 23? nope!!
3 + 6 + 5 = 14!!
Chemical lesson,
substance tai tai = 太太
substance gong gong = 公公
therefore, substance 太太 + substance 公公 = In Love

full of plasters are 101 but actually answer 100, due to her random little plaster. Some of the plasters are so obvious that what are written inside but i slowly peel it off and read it. *No suffering, no gain*
Until now haven't take breakfast, lunch and water cause i haven't finish my tasks. Finally all are over! Weeeeeeeeee~*
So who is the she, the her i am referring non-stop?
就是她，我的亲爱的爱爱aka未来老婆.
宝贝爱你，爱爱!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
big head with little arms

Needles through my brain

2007-04-13T00:35:00.000+08:00

The worried from me, you don't know.
The cared that brought to you, you can't absorb in.
The pain that i hurt for you, you don't understand .
The feeling to accompany through your unwell, i have no chance to play my role.
Just like back to baseball time, being a 2nd baseman is just like a sitting-duck .
Just don't know how to place myself, hope she will be alright in all time
All i know that, you love me and same goes to me.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的是我需要你, Pirate of the Buggybean

The long await

2007-04-10T16:59:00.000+08:00

[Tue]
Life at home is just nothing much but just recently of new colours added in my life. Therefore, my life is more exciting than before. Hey hey, i'm mentioning about you, not others and don't throw my cadet's name in. Plus recently watching new anime, [Fate Stay Night], it's very nice with good story. If you like anime too, why not try watching it ^^ Haha~* Today a bit special, i had my gong gong life not long ago, 40 minutes of back massage. At first i though it will be very enjoyable, but when the person start massaging. Then i went "OuCccHh!!", i had forgotten massage is painful. Overall indeed his skill is good but his left arm not so strong for a massager! Erm, spent $28 instead of $23. Though of paying $23 but it's a package and overall it cost $140 for 6 sessions which is each $23. Perhaps next visit then get the package, then can have couple massage!! Wahahaa~*

[Mon]
*Pirate of the Buggybean*
Ermm, now i know that kuku people like kuku people and i'm in kuku category. Wait wait, she is kuku too! Opss~* Sent her work and went to shave hair.. Really had a quite clean shaving as my hair really gone short like "ah wang". Just like a little nerd. Apparently, it's refreshing too so it's ok. The clean shaving cost me to wait from bright to dawn to night where i kept turning my head to left of the wide window. I'm totally fine of it as there was a green tea served to me. Waited from 5.30pm to 8.10pm and my hair started to get shave. The worst thing, i need to let her waited. 我很不好意事. Though of asking her to go home but i wish to see her.. Selfish of me :( Guys out there, it's not good to learn this from me! We ate ~~Cup~~ Bowl Noodle and don't what tidbits with a cup of 100 plus with Lemon tea. Quite a fine dinning. (0_ o)''
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的是我需要你, Pirate of the Buggybean

Sky dropping??

2007-04-06T20:56:00.001+08:00

Erm? No falling objects!!
The "beach" were flood with humans and humans. Staying at the "beach" that have no sand, swim at the "sea" that no salt water, lay on the "sandy beach" that is total sand free and doing "fishing" at "beach" while i am not a fishmonger and my eyes are totally close most of the time. Each time my eyes close i either think of her or see weird stuffs aka weird dreams. Didn't have chance to speak up. Around me are all noise but deep in me is total silent, discreet, speechless and not even hearing any vibration sound. pathetic? Well, no idea ^^
Holding phone and pulling down isn't fun at all.. Whether to sms or not isn't fun at all too...
Gold 95 was accompanying all the night long..
30 minutes to a new day. How will my new day be, fun? Seems like today not my day indeed. Right now i feel like laying on a decent, warming and comfortable beach. To Sentosa? Everything is just a flash thinking. Good night my dearest love, 爱爱。
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的是我需要你, show me the meaning of been in lonely

today? Today? today?

2007-04-06T15:26:00.000+08:00

What had i done so far?

Playing goonzu for the day?
Nope i didn't for long, just an hour the most.
Chatting on phone part of the day?
Nope i didn't talk on phone except 爱爱 call.
Chatting msn with friends?
Nope for sure cause i leave my status as "Away".
Eating the whole day?
Nope nope, only had my lunch and green tea for accommodation.
Play PC's games?
Nope also.. Didn't touch PC games for around months
Surf internet?
Nope nope, don'y even remember there's internet surfing, just blogged once.
Doing sms-ing the whole day?
Nope nope too.. No one sms me expect 亲爱的爱爱 only.
More and more? Nope nope nope too..

Erm.. For sure that i was breathing the whole afternoon. I was just wanting to use computer but then... i feel so noob. Noob as in i was stoning there and didn't know what are my next moves. Sitting now looking at computer with 1 hand moving not because i was busy, is just that i am too free. Looking out of shinning sun that sweat and melt me down with the thinking of "is my 爱爱 alright? Anymore itchiness or pains that she is enduring now.." Well, nothing much in mind just stoning and kind of lonely with walls around until i just open my windows. Perhaps sometimes, i am just an enclose person. Enclose?
Sometimes life is just about waiting for replies. Nothing much cause replies are something that can also lead you by moving ahead.
Hug me, kiss me?? Hug with comfort?
Having 2 contracts on..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的是我需要你

Qn.1 Why i called Hansiong? (5marks)

Let subject Han be Sweaty
Let subject Siong be Bear
Therefore Hansiong = Sweaty Bear.

Marks given: 5 marks

Madness Thursday

2007-04-06T01:28:00.000+08:00

My day is just so fine.. Had lots of surprise fun between 宝贝 and 爱爱。 Very random fun!! Even though my throat hurt a lot when i just sneezed only and even speak up. But having you is just my everything that i just need to cure my illness.
Haiz, i still find my answer that you wish for..?? Am i going to stuck here? *Oh nooo!!*
Sometimes i think i really scared her. Don't how to sew the loopholes.. *Gosh*
Though that my result is deep shit like having grades like 2 As, 1 B and 1 C. *wAHaHaa* Surprise once again.. And let's take a look below...
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的。。需要你 <年轻老人病 >

Exam Results - View
Sports and Wellness II: Grade S
Comp Maint and Communication: Grade A
Linux Fundamentals and Sys Adm: Grade A
Computing Maths and Program: Grade A
Industrial Attachment : Grade A

Grade Description

S Satisfactory
A Excellent

4th April 7007

2007-04-04T22:43:00.000+08:00

First thing first, 4th April 2007 has no link to Number 23.
Today we had almost traveled around the island except West area. Went for a movie at Plaza Singapura, we watched "Number 23" with cheesy breakfast but i didn't really watch the whole show cause my bladders were going to burst. Well i think my life are great, at least i don't have Number 23. The numbers that occur in my life are 14 and 26 which are loving numbers.. We had the real and original Grilled Fish Rice after a long queue. Even though we are not "full" but we managed to finish our meal. Sitting at Changi Airport might be bored, waste time and more, but i was totally alright with it. My day with you is my everything. After the long sitting and the no special kissing from you that need a "condition" to get it, we went to have our "Popeyes". Oh noo... It's very nice nice nice nice hooooo~`* We had good dinner but thanks to the oily juice!!
By the way, i had nose bleeding for awhile.. *tsktsk*

"Loving you is my life, nothing can fall between us"
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的。。需要你 <年轻老人病 >

我怀念的。。需要你

2007-04-02T13:58:00.000+08:00

<需要你>
那天晚上
望着海洋
想了很久
才想清楚
是我不安
是我无法摆脱寂寞

放下自己
忘了失去
我不再是
你的唯一
一片寂静
只剩下海潮的声音

明明不在
我学会忍耐
一个人我应该
需要你
又逃不开
让脑袋游在
充满你模糊的
想象里

明明不在
我学会忍耐
一个人曾想过
放弃
都明明需要你
却还犹豫不定

Is it real that things go easy like ABC?
Now life at home is like back track to where i was late 2005, which is 1 year 8 months.. Life at home is miserable. It's like back to wake up, play game, frozen in front of computer, back to sleep and it is like all in cycle. It is quite scary and lonely when you have no one who are close around you. It is like living in the cute little colourful box where inside is total darkness. Image when you raise hand and place it in front of your eyes and it is 5cm away, and you cannot see anything. The ease i can get is when i have her by my side.
Having you by my side, keeping you with my arms, caring you with my heart, touching you with all my soul and mind, loving you with all me. 我爱你!!!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
我怀念的。。需要你

Bad(s) of me?

2007-03-30T00:53:00.000+08:00

From the could not fall asleep night until now, kept thinking how bad am i? Maybe sometimes, some part in me really too much.. I have and must to control myself a lot. I tried very hard. Not to tickle or more.., i tried but it was not like me.
How much that i am not myself? I do not even remember that Bleach always release on Thursday. Usually i was very keen and eager on Tuesday that that Bleach is releasing soon but until just now Gerald called and reminded me.
Eventually a person bad habits must change so i will try but... ...
I really don't know what to do... I think i better get going back to bed, not to worry her.
Deepest in love with you, 我一生中就深爱的女人.
我爱你
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
slowly and faulty or aching?

2007-03-29T19:42:00.000+08:00

speak or not is not the point cause heart is like pumping unwell
seeking for the whys in mind. thinking to much?

Roll, Rolling, Rolled down the bed

2007-03-29T03:06:00.000+08:00

back to blog..
cannot fall asleep until now. late night with no sound but only the sound of my personal unit's fans spinning. anyone whispering to me? the fans or my soul.. no idea too. only know my heart is still pumping very slowly, stopping soon? Do not ask me, no idea too...
staring and stoning, living and starving with bloated stomach. aimless waiting till both legs are not your that you do not have the feel of it.
effect or affect?
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
slowly and faulty soon?

Life is just about Countdown Timer

2007-03-26T22:36:00.000+08:00

Every time when got we dispatched, it is always about countdown to the next date. Seriously am i getting use to it? I must say a NO to it, i am totally not use to it.. Even though we have been together quite some times but it is still a NO to it.
Do not know why and it is not easy not to miss someone you care and love a lot in your life. People in love, you should understand my feelings.
The feel for you are greatly very strong in me!!
By the way, we caught red handed by Feng Yuan. Who will be the next one?

Whether in work or in relationships, achieving good health or breaking bad habits, we all have the capacity to turn into an ostrich, put our head in the sand and hope it will all go away.
It is not a good idea to run away, we should step out and move forwards.
"No halting and dig a spot for yourself cause the hole is not big for you to fit in."
Think a about it?
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... Hug me, kiss me! var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
因为，我的每一刻都想在你!

A nice try by dad

2007-03-24T12:30:00.000+08:00

Vibration from my bed to my ear. Someone called me!!
Even before my eyes are looking at the new morning world, i was dreaming of her.
When i opened my real "little" eyes, my brain firstly think of is you, 我的未来老婆!!

Oh Gosh...
It was my kuku dad!! *TMD*
Turn me off...

Never mind. Now better get back online with 爱爱。
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
因为，我的每一刻都想在你!

Friday Fever!!!

2007-03-24T00:43:00.000+08:00

Friday Fever!!! Haha!
Evey things for today are all Wahaha!!
Instead of thinking whether can i get good result for Cmath, teacher told me i have 90 plus for it.
Instead of getting $150 as a reward from him, i got $200!! "Damm overwhelming"
I will listen to 未来老婆 and save $50 to spending bank and $150 saving bank.
Basket Kenneth cursed me, think he was just jealous that i am in stable relationship and he is not. Well, when he cursed me, i was happen to worry this and that but i cover my ears. The emotional of me might pull me to the DARK SIDE.

TMNT is really great! Only those basket in front of us, so noise but they were just like me when i was their age. Naughty and playful!!!
We ate "miss" Meji 99% Chocolate! Pikabooo~* It was wow wow wowooo feeling!! So bitter that we almost puke out!! Eventually the ending taste gave us a sweet feeling.

Should not meet but we still met up..
Always happy to see her， even though i look her with saying anything and she will said with a staring face, "Ya" or "看什么啊?"
The look at her is actually all my love that i want to tell her with my unspoken feelings..
"don't know she feels it a not" (cause it's so random)
What i know is that, how much you change, i love you till the last breathe i have. How bad your skin is, it is my concern cause i will always feel the pain with you. I will not let you stand by your own cause in the future, it is all only about us.
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
Don't think my future wife is a blackie anymore, safe?

2007-03-23T00:38:00.000+08:00

And not for getting my 爱心 plaster!
我很感动!!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
在未来的世界, 我会爱你爱到永远

2nd blog of my day

2007-03-22T23:03:00.000+08:00

Where did we went to?
Well basically, we traveled to her tuition kids' house for her tuition. After that i went to Westmall and walked around that i had around 3 years never stepped there. There are a lot of shops as before. Special things over there is that there is a FOOD FAIR!!! Smell real nice and look tasty. But i did not get any cause dinner soon at AMK's Subway's liquidly Meatball. It was a bit soft but the taste still not bad. "maybe cause she was sitting in front of me?" Haha~* After dinner, walked around in AMK Hub. The place have it's future!
Soon, we traveled back her home.
When the unwilling goodbye, she gave a little surprised. It was warm, sweet, shocked and i did not know how to react to it. But just looking at her when she left me.

Last time i told myself that "Must not get a girlfriend who stay at Yishun cause it's so far away!"
Now it is not about the far.. Cause all my life is about our love!

hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
在未来的世界, 我会爱你爱到永远

1.45pm

2007-03-22T14:01:00.001+08:00

Could not sleep well cause my back aching, perhaps is all about lack of workups. Well, it is about time to get myself start moving in it.
Lazy of me can't make me go far!
Either i close or open my eyes, she will appear in me. It is not about my eyes but about my mind and soul.
Should not say much, time to go out!
Aiai here i come~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
在未来的世界, 我会爱你爱到永远

Another Wednesday(s)..?

2007-03-21T23:11:00.000+08:00

Any Wednesday always bring to lots of places in mind.. Kept thinking of every time we met on Wednesday or i can said over "dating time" that we did not declare it. It was kind of funny indeed! The flashback were nice, funny, interesting, secrets that we got to hide and more.. Everything were all in our mind, just that we did not speak up.

Npcc again? Am i going back again?
Unit is in deep trouble since they are all young leaders and they are not dare enough to make their choices. Dare not to speak up their minds with their rights! Some of the things are not teach very oral but by hardship..
"Don't tell me you went through hardship, it's all bullshit to me! I;m just very frank to you, my apprentices and sorry to hurt you."

Zouk for today? Not my type anymore! I have my own life even though it is like a very special event that i should or like to go.. Right now what i know is that love line are important beside my education. My education going to have end soon but this is not what i aiming for due to my National Service. After NS then i let continue what i going for cause now is like a pitch of dark that i do not know where i am standing.
I might be worth in market but i want a better pricing for myself as to support my future.

BBQ.. Haha.. TMD and Damm IT!! Kuku Tan Wei Leong have even confirm the food and he will give me lots of excuses or nah nah nahhh... All are just expected!
Haiz, let me just clear me shitty jobs.. Standard as always!!!

Having you is just having a lifetime floating device. When i am drowning, you will sure be the one by my side!
No doubts on you!!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
在未来的世界, 我会爱你爱到永远

[爱爱]

2007-03-20T16:07:00.000+08:00

[爱爱]

有你在身旁爱我一点
让我的生活过得越来越甜
世界不停在变~不要！

你把这世界变得太完美
一天过一天
爱你多一些
我现在了解
什麽最珍贵
你是我的宝贝
oh! lady 我所有一切

有你在身旁爱我一点
让我的生活过得越来越甜
世界不停在变(我)会爱你多一点
希望你能够看见一切不改变
i'm your man

原来你一直都在我身边
陪伴我渡过黑夜和白天
在未来的世界
我会爱你爱到永远

Sometimes it's not about how the song goes like or sound how nice.
It's the fact how you sing with your true feelings even though my voice sound yucky.
In fact when i sing it, it's really helping me to clear my unspoken feelings.
Loving someone not easy cause always don't know whether is there anything called "enough".
What i know that is...
"爱爱，你在我心中是就珍贵。没有人能够 replace 你在我的心。"
"握在，抱在你然我有你的感觉。"
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
在未来的世界, 我会爱你爱到永远

Happy day & Counting down again!!!

2007-03-19T20:58:00.000+08:00

Every seconds, minutes and hours are just like a speed of a housefly.
"don't think she likes housefly cause its annoying"
our date is actually from 9am - 5pm. haha~* we are just so early to meet up which is around 8.45am. maybe both of us eager to see each other? erm, yes i was very eager!!! *ops*
went to 乌节路 and this was the first i had such a great breathing atmospheres.
ate our breakfast over at Long John Silver, yummy~*
"don't think she likes it, think giving me to me, 爱死她了 "
then watch movie, 300.
ermmm, perhaps it was not a bad one! lots of slow motion moves that quite attracted me with their firm and well-trained combats! kind of a more to M18 to R21!!
aiya.. have not watch before and do not think i am going for it.
can not find the watch arh.. try again perhaps?
went to Centrepoint's Macdonald's and sat there for around 2 hours for large ice lemon tea with over leftover breakfast..
"地啊, even i also can't finish it"
went walking around in OG and Centrepoint's Wing which is new extension. well i can say it is nothing much there.
a unwilling feeling walking from PS to Park Mall's bus-stop.
a feeling that a small kid always carry with him or her. even though i am 21 this year but funny thing is i had that strong feeling..
"不是 funny的事，太过小孩子 "

new objective: wait till Wednesday
at least 30 hours to go!!

What i know is we are moving together...
she knows it well, and same to me!
i know she is having difficulties at home, i do not know how to help..
what i know is just to keep myself low profile..
天天开开心心就好了
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
oh no, will my future wife be a blackie?

Sum up the days

2007-03-16T14:28:00.000+08:00

16 march
which is today, same operating day like yesterday..
woke up at 11am.. going to have lunch around 3.30pm that is very hungry arh
*DI ARH* going to eat soon...
soon late eat is worth it.. cause 等等你。

new objective: wait wait wait till monday

15 march
yesterday,
everything seems so far away!!
well... woke up quite late, think i woke up around 12pm.
kind of tired and do not have any plan so slack at home. though of going out to walk walk but did not want to spend money. not like spending on buying stuff but like spending on food.. cause food are so expensive..
my life is like 4 months ago, slack at home and play game. i miss out the game a lot but i do not really bothered. what i care was, i missed up my friendship in the game, lots of friends gone and i do not know.. *tsktsk*
had late lunch around 2pm, yummy indeed..
i had my char siew roasted pork rice with additional of rice and lots of chilli!
before late dinner around 9pm...
i was kind of worried about her cause she did not reply me..
that is it.. when she not around my circle and my circle's is just so small that i can spread my arms. i feel so worried and total speechless and numb..
that is where i know she is soooooo important in my life..
and regard her as my 未来老婆.

new objective: wait wait till monday

14 march
the day that i finish my paper..
when i saw the paper, is like "OH NOOoo". it was totally difference paper which are all in theory form. and i very poor in it..
think my grade will be poor for this..
but who cares, whatever then cause it was the past.

waited quite long at chinatown, strolled aimlessly for at least an hour with old uncles and aunties around me.

the evening was the best moment..
we had korean food for dinner.. even though the kimchi were very sour but i still like it...
eating kimchi gives me the feeling that i'm with her.. ^^
went to fort canning to chill but time flies real fast..
2 hours past with any notice to us.

together 1 month is like,
we had already been together 6 months plus.
time always flies fast
perhaps it's about quality, not quantity
already regard you as my
未来的你, 未来的老婆
before i ask you to be my partner
no regret cause 那是我们的爱

new objective: wait till monday

hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
having u is just a freezing & melting season with 未来的你

Totally no complains!

2007-03-13T20:49:00.000+08:00

"Haha no no today no diff..
only diff is today i love you
more than yesterday ah..
Everything else doesn't
change"
That's from you, my last and only!
from msg, 13th march, 20:47

"Oh now no more melt le..
Good good time to become
solid again Haha.. Ya lor
only you can have me ah
other ppl want also
cannot:) i also don't want
other ppl ah.."
That's from you, my last and only!
from msg, 13th march, 20.54

i really have no complains at all for my 爱情.
give a tons of reasons not to 不爱你, that's impossible..
your name had already place and attach in my heart, mind and soul..
kept thinking,想在，thinking,想在andthinking,想在你。
想在，想在，想在你 = 我爱你
mushy 死了! 地啊!

just took my Cmath paper, thinking getting a pass is no problem.. i took a a wrong question but hoping might give me some marks from there.. thinking of getting 90 marks should be fine but 90 marks is from my mouth not examiner mouth and he/her hand.
my $150 is on examiner's hands. please help me ah!
tomorrow Ccom paper, totally no confidence.. no idea where to start to write when i touch the paper. i did read up and know what is going on but i just have a feeling i can apply what i know in my head.. is it over due to stress up?
let's see how on tomorrow ba!

爱的路上只有我和你

不知道什么时候开始喜欢这里
每个夜里都会来这里看你
你长的这么美丽叫我不能不看你
看不到你我就迷矢了自己

好想牵你的手走过风风雨雨
有什么困难我都陪着你
直到天长地久直到天荒地老
爱的路上只有我和你

不知道什么时候开始喜欢这里
每个夜里都会来这里看你
你长的这么美丽叫我不能不看你
看不到你我就迷矢了自己

有时候你很调皮总是让我着急
一颗心总是为你跳不停
只要一闭上眼睛总有千百万个你
你的影子装满我的脑海里

不能够不想你也不能够忘记你
总是在梦里一直看到你
多想对你说句我是真的爱你
对我的心不要再怀疑

好想牵你的手走过风风雨雨
有什么困难我都陪着你
直到天长地久直到天荒地老
爱的路上只有我和你

好想牵你的手走过风风雨雨
有什么困难我都陪着你
直到天长地久直到天荒地老
爱的路上只有我和你

for you, my last and only!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
having u is just a freezing & melting season

After 4 days of not using you

2007-03-13T00:47:00.000+08:00

hey.. kind of bad news. can't go out for long on wed. but at least we can meet up, i am very glad.
exam is tomorrow and i am still quite stoning cause i kept having a feeling that something haven't do yet. *feeling kind of uncomfortable*
kept having the feeling that i am a stone in front of you that making you having hard time; like our future. cause sometimes in life, i just dislike myself to be someone who create trouble to people, but i believe what you said and i can take a breathe from here onwards.
ouch.. head so numb!

are we living in different world?
we are not in different world as...
we are creating and having our own..
that is what kept troubling me, but your words make me realize the solution
great!!

understand that we have happy time together but unpleasant time after we dispatch,
like your family.. that make you so tired, uncomfortable and making you to endure a lot..
can't bare to see you suffering..

to me,
not sweet talk.. i treasure you a lot with lots of unspoken feeling that i can't express myself..
too WOOOW to have you, 亲爱"cum"可爱的爱爱!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
having u is just a melting season

welll...

2007-03-07T23:34:00.000+08:00

Exam coming in 5 days time.. everything are not well prepared!
hard to achieve what i wish for!
well, i will surely continue work towards my goal.

so hard to understand
misty with fog from perception
unreachable with doubts
confusion and stoning in the end
difficult to get known
but will fruitful smile
cause i still have you

hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on
unreachable with doubts

t0uCh

2007-02-28T23:48:00.000+08:00

Today school quite ok.. school time is like as usually; use computer, studying and lots of tests.
another 8 days of lessons, going to say bye bye to my fellow friends..
hard to meet friends like that but it is always a hard time to have gathering, that is why friendships can't last long..

Did studied at home but all my materials and answers are found in no books and need to search from internet.. troublesome~*
after that watched movie, Apocalypto. it is nice and interesting story.
but... ... behind part the show have some problem, the sound is not following the movie arh!
watched until so weird... not bad overall cause hansiong was accompanying me~*
*hao xin fu si le*

went hougang mall to have dinner.. haha~*
step into chatel, not really much people.. beside me and hansiong.. only another few more peoples.. not bad.., dinner cum supper was nice but fattening arh~*
still have hope to reduce fat too..
takes time and need workup!!!

byebye with the touch
even it was just split second

the little second was just like matrix
matrix that contains lot of
lot of unexpress feeling
hao hao wor~*

hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

Birthday!!

2007-02-27T00:42:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to me~*
oh no, i'm older now.. started to have trouble on future le..
about my future of me, the job i will have or even anymore education?
think about family too.. kind of trouble le..
is it 21 year old sickness?

i spent my day in school from 8am to 5.30pm.. long day in school with friends wishing me and best part that made me out of the blue! my 3 teachers assistant bought me a "Royal" cake. it my birthday cake! yummy very nice! didn't expected that they were do something to my birthday!
so nice of them!
after school went to meet hansiong, she was on time but we don't where to eat. so we went to town to walk walk and see wheather have nice food ma.. we ate at coffee club, yummy and not bad too... food is decent~* then went dating with hansiong.. haha~*
don't wish to go home but too bad..! it's just so late!

this year, i didn't expect a lot or even expect anything..
wow~* turned up to be my best birthday.. have kind of surprise of cake from lab assistant.
and one important thing is, hansiong accompany through the rest of my night.. kept me ease and warm.. my best present is you!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

After Chalet, on my Birthday

2007-02-26T00:38:00.000+08:00

During chalet when celebration started, i was very busy but i took it very easy. casue i don't care lot of stuff. what i had done during that moment, were kept on saying...
"Hi, xie xie xie xie"
"The food are over there, just go and take and don't shy shy"
"sorry, i go over there"
"pai seh, pai seh.. kinda to busy"
"Hey, thanks for coming, bye bye!"
very things like so fake!
i didn't really invite so friends that i should have, didn't get to see my friends and i just feel very very bad i can't be a good host! sick of me!
worst think, i thought i can accompany her but i kept busy and no time to go over..
i feel so bad towards her.. like threw her aside.. until now i still feel very bad..

yeah~* yeah~*
my birthday le... every year i expect a lot. but this year just take thing easy..
not going to expect so much even though is 21th.. *who care so much*
she also not free,. so i kinda shut down a bit..
21th le... life just so liike that...
having you is just part of my major life..
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

Blue World

2007-02-21T23:39:00.000+08:00

heading to school with a dizzy head.. lucky i had my yucky oat milk to accompany through out my journey.
late for assembly without knowing that today is wedenesday and i even pack my bag to monday's timetable. heavy bag i had today!
my 2 lessons really killed me!
Bang bAng~* *heaD Shot*
VB really made me doze off.. Can't concertrate well today maybe still on CNY mood! more break please?
during 1hour 30min break time, lao cao and i were called upon to staff room.
wow~* smart in eating our break time, i was asked to do that kuku LKY presentation for no reason.

erm.. ghostrider is "nice". not bad!
sometimes, some shows might not turn up to be nice but it's also depend who you were with and the show will turn from bad to BEST!
wAhaHaa~*
miss the bah chor mee.. never mind, that shows we should go again le!
not bad too!!! good food always need to wait.. fine with it!

where's my wife to be?
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double with 2 contracts on

3rd days of CNY

2007-02-21T01:09:00.000+08:00

Oh dear..
3rd of CNY and my angbao operation failed!
actually i can get at least 20 more angbaos but i didn't choose to move towards my goal. just slacking at my lao shi's house and play i-toys.
damm kuku fun but very tiring with lots of sweats. *yucky*

9 more days to submit my project and it's only 49% done with not design ah.
with birthday chalet and lots of stuff how to do the project!
need a mobile PC, which is laptop to do it but don't have arh..
*Sob*

love line is messy to me as always..
but now... my view have changed!

a messy little one is just the past
the pretty side of u is just what i wish for
and i found u right from the beginning i knew u
i'm just so slow from the start we met
finally i try to reach u
and here we are~*
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double

Chinese New Year Eve

2007-02-17T00:36:00.000+08:00

Yahooo~*
just got my new set of clothing; a long sleeve shirt and a pant.
cost me around $110. too bad, i want to get a leather shoe but out of my budget list. *what a waste*

i just got my first birthday present. a renoma wallet.. think it's quite expensive!
hate to settle my birthday chalet, too useless..
wishing that she can pei me but there're lots of restrictions ahead!

Let the Ang Bao Operation begin!!
so far, i have 3 ang bao le.. from lao ma's friend, god-sis and connie auntie.
great great.. feel slightly richer le.. *value added*

nice nice,
just have my 2 contracts up with my "lawyer" aiai!
haha.. lifetime contracts! weeeeeeeeee
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double

Flasshhh

2007-02-15T22:39:00.000+08:00

Well well,
time passed very fast and once again i at home now... today is just so bored in school. felt so lost when teacher was teaching, i was like catching no balls.. *gone ah*
wanting to chat with u but no chance.. limited sms even my sms limit had over flooded! want to get close but hard!
hAnsIoNg~* 孫燕姿... var: dim hansiong as double

Life Of Mine

Incoming...

coffee, tea or me?

What is relationship?

Too heavy or to unload...?

Is it men are not suppose to understand women?

girls' do, boys' don't

Because of me

alike?

am i weak?

Who knows?

72days down to go...

How can i ease you?

The 6th day of this month

Are you calling?

senses

HOME

The day after Children's day

M y b a d

Good Morning

B vs B

Chinese15th

September 24, 2007

I'm Added

Comments 52.

Days are coming...

the first set

Is me and you..

Timetable

a n y thing

LG, Life Good

Fate

pending mode

will or will not...

The day after yesterday

Long little Wednesday

who? who ask?

sometimes

Calling it..

Where i stand?

sen si tiv ity lev el?

Dunno Post

Freeloader

-unknown-

Isn't sweet at all..

The miss posts for 5

"Sweaty" Journey back home

Lucky Draw

Umbrella sanking!

Nights fall, Dawn arise.

Chill day

The bus to home

Slacking day after chalet

It's yesterday once more

The late post yet the sweetest

Needles through my brain

The long await

Sky dropping??

today? Today? today?

Madness Thursday

4th April 7007

我怀念的。。需要你

Bad(s) of me?

Roll, Rolling, Rolled down the bed

Life is just about Countdown Timer

*A nice try by dad*

Friday Fever!!!

2nd blog of my day

1.45pm

Another Wednesday(s)..?

[爱爱]

Happy day & Counting down again!!!

Sum up the days

Totally no complains!

After 4 days of not using you

welll...

*t0uCh*

Birthday!!

After Chalet, on my Birthday

Blue World

A nice try by dad

t0uCh